JULIE BRINKER BYERS MESSAGE TO DAD TONY JOAQUIN

(AS OF AUGUST 29, 2016 DURING JULIE BRINKER BYERS

VISIT TO SACRAMENTO.)

Daddy Joaquin

A celebration of life…what a life it was! As I stand here with a hole in my heart and a leak in my eyes to pay final respects for Tony, I am honored he called me daughter. I know I don’t have his charming good looks or his melodic singing voice, but I did inherit his love of writing. He always wanted me to write a book entitled Rotex to Rotarian, but since I never became a Rotarian, the book remains unwritten. However, that is where this story begins.

More than 30 years ago, I was a Rotary Exchange Student to the Philippines. Dad was the President of Makati West Rotary Club who hosted me. To this day, I can’t see West Side Story and not think of all the singing and dancing at Makati West events! Nevertheless, I digress.

As a sweet sixteen year old, I excitedly walked off the plane in Manila to begin my adventure. I was met by Rudy Ordonez and his 2 sons. They were supposed to be my first host family, but they explained they could not take me for a few months so I would stay with someone else. They drove me to the Peninsula Hotel where I nervously walked into the lobby to meet Tony Joaquin. Tony was very blunt and I was very tired. For the first time, I was questioning my decision to be an exchange student.

Anyway, Tony took me to their apartment. The Joaquins were building a house so the 5 kids and 2 parents were in a 3-bedroom apartment, I, of course, made the apartment even smaller.

At breakfast the next morning, the kids were excited to have an American with them, They couldn’t wait to teach me Tagalog and Filipino culture. They made me feel welcome.

A few days later, I came home from school and was told to gather my belongings. They had found a host family for me and I would be moving!

However, the move did not sever the relationship I had with the Joaquins. They had already become my family. They included me in family activities. They invited me periodically to Sunday meals. My little sister invited me to parties. My oldest sister taught me to dance for the talent portion of a beauty pageant I was in. My older brother gave me free food at McDonalds. My middle sister was and still is the rock. My other brother remained quiet in my presence. Dad never failed to introduce me as his daughter at any social gathering.

The time had come to say good-bye to the Philippines and all of my friends and families. As I took the seat on the plane, the tears started flowing. I cried more that day than I have ever cried. I was leaving a part of my heart behind in the Philippines. I was afraid I would never see my friends and families again. I read the good-bye letters and cried some more. One of them said, “Forget me is up to you, forget you I will never do!” I knew I would never forget the special times, the bonds of friendship and family that I formed.

Due to the political unrest in the Philippines, within a few years, my families started moving to California. While I have been back to visit the Philippines, it is much easier to visit California. Each trip whether for business or with my American family, I would see my Filipino families. I have been included in 25 and 50 year anniversary  parties. I have been invited to weddings and to dinners. Facebook has allowed all of us to keep up with trips, family additions, health concerns, and just day to day life.

As I say good-bye, I look at my dad and know that I am his daughter since he chose to love me. He chose to be a father and support me, encourage me, celebrate with me. He chose to remain in contact with me even across many miles. I am blessed to be a part of this family. Dad, I love you and will miss you but I will never forget you!

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